Timing
by Canadino
Summary: America was absolutely horrible at timing, England realized. US/UK


**Disclaimer: If Axis Powers Hetalia were mine, I wouldn't need to write fanfics. If any of these songs were mine, I wouldn't be writing fanfics.**

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**Minimal fluff 09!**

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Timing

America was absolutely _shitty_ when it came to timing. England realized this from very early on, but hoped that perhaps with age, his former colony would finally know when to come instead of arriving when the host was still in the shower or bursting in when everyone was finished with dinner. No coordination whatsoever.

The problem/habit presented itself even at the beginning of their relationship, when England was having a full-out battle with France and America just appeared at his side and said, ignorant of the fight around him, "I like you, England. Do you like me?"

"Not a good moment!" England had snapped as France came at him again. When he was finally done (whupping France's ass), he came across a dejected America, who had no idea why he had been snapped at. Of course, when England had (erlack) apologized (although it wasn't his fault), America jumped up and glomped him, that ass-headed idiot.

Then even with that problem eluded, America had announced that he would be giving England his first (although really, it was neither of them's first kiss) kiss in due time, when the moment and atmosphere was right. England should have known what that meant in American English.

When England had experienced some of the subway bombings, many of the nations responded and America had visited and walked home with him once. When they had stopped on the doorstep, England was sure this was what America meant when he said 'the right moment', but apparently not, because America only told him good night and went off as if he hadn't just ruined a perfectly fine moment.

It wasn't that England was particularly eager to kiss America, it was just that he wanted it to be over with since the nation was so popular on the whole concept. And faster it was over, the less he'd have to anticipate a surprise attack. England never likes being surprised.

Another moment arose when America called just to say he was coming over (and ended up wasting both their times by dragging England around London and commenting on how America was just _so_ much better). There had been many chances for a picture-perfect (dear lord) kiss but America hadn't picked up on the vibes and ended the day by dropping England off and skipping back to his homeland. By then, England seriously doubted America's intentions.

They had gone to see a (American) movie at America's insistence, and it happened to be a cliché, old remake of some classic British love story but the mood had been set. Of course, America ruined it again by wondering why it was so goddamn cold in the theater, causing England to storm out, followed by America ("You've got the right idea, England. If they treat us like meat, we should just leave!").

America brought England out on walks a lot, since they did have an alliance (hello, Greece and Japan had an alliance too and look where that brought them, nudge, nudge, wink, wink). It was quite nice, England would reluctantly admit, being with America even if the latter spent the whole time whining about himself. Sometimes when it was cold, America would know just when England was thinking it and reached over to take his hand.

Don't. Don't say, "Aww…" God help you, England would viciously rip out the vocal cords of anyone in the near vicinity that uttered that one syllable phrase. And again, after those walks, America would deposit him back at his door without so much as a see-you-later kiss.

Sometimes, when the mood got kinky, America _would_ give him attention of some sort, but it was as if the bespectacled man refused to meet their mouths. "It's not romantic if we kiss and have sex," America had said when England brought it up. "It's so shallow."

What part of America wasn't, England wanted to say, but the guy's ego was too easily damaged. Call him fat and he got self-aware. Call him stupid and he would shoot back defensively. Call him guilty and he would cry and moan at your feet until you said _all right already, I was wrong! Get up!_ England had dealt with him so many times he knew when to speak and when to shut up because it didn't matter. Stupid America.

One day, England was having a meeting with Parliament and all the higher ups of society when America suddenly burst into the meeting room. This wasn't uncommon, as America was used to bursting into things and putting his nose where it wasn't wanted. Parliament turned to the blonde, who was storming over to England's side at the head of the table. "England!"

"America, what on earth do you want now? I'm in a meeting, so make it quick."

"Alright." America pulled England to his feet and before England could resist, bent the accented nation over and planted a red-carpet, ballroom kind of kiss that earned them shocked gasps all around. The meeting room started to empty as they 'gave the nations space' and a few shot them anxious glances. England roughly shoved America off when the room was completely deserted.

"You…insensitive git! What was that for?"

"What?" America looked surprised. "Wasn't that the perfect moment?"

He had considered it before, but England decided to give up on all reason when it came to all things America.

Owari

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Note: You know you've done this. Have really bad timing. You know you have when there's an awkward silence after you speak. Yes, America, do say and do weird things and weird moments. And the rest of the world (England) puts up with him. Review, or America will pop in during the next funeral you attend and burst out in song: Stayin' Alive by the BeeGees. Oh yes he will.


End file.
